I believe that everyone experiences this kind of change every once in a while in their lives. It may happen at any point in our lives. Mine came when I was about to graduate from high school and I knew that everything would change. There are several things that can happen during a huge change such as this, and I had people from my graduating class do both of these. You can choose to stay where you are, in your comfort zone and continue to do what you know and what you are comfortable with or you can choose to jump into the unknown.
I chose the latter.
I was at war with myself for a while during my senior year of high school. Should I stay at home and continue doing what I know? Should I be brave and take a chance? My answer came when I received a ballet scholarship to study at Friends University. At this moment, I knew I had to leave. I was very excited but underneath that, I was also terrified. I had to leave Texas, my family, my home, my friends, my comfort zone, and all that I had known and move to Kansas to live with someone I didn't know, go to classes with people I didn't know, and dance under teachers I wasn't familiar with. It was terrifying.
Some people may know this but there were many times during my first semester that I almost gave in to the fear that was surrounding me. I almost moved back home, stopped dancing all together, and just quit. Life was testing me and I almost gave up. Thankfully, I didn't. I am still dancing, still going to Friends, and still continuing to grow in myself and my abilities.
This journey that I am on has not been easy in any way. I have been challenged and knocked down more times than I care to count. I have cried more tears than I care to remember and I have been in pain more times than I care to write about. The one thing that has stuck with me since senior year is this idea of flying. My parents said at the end of my blessing video for graduation, "now, you can fly." I didn't really know what that would mean back then, but I think I do now. Flying has always been an image that I hold in my head and I can relate to. In order to fly, you have to take off against the wind. I didn't know it at the time but as I left for college I was definitely going against the wind. Turning around and just letting the wind carry me would have been easier, and I almost did that. But since I started here, I haven't turned around. I have pushed into the wind and stood my ground. You will never be able to fly with the wind at your back so stand strong in the change. Grow and live through the change and maybe in those moments you will start to fly and just maybe find out who you truly are.
"She took the leap and built her wings on the way down."
Life is an adventure and sometimes it takes jumping over the edge in order to truly know what you are made of. You might fall and fail.... but what if you learn to fly instead?
